The *uckenings 41

Have you ever thought about the fact, that no matter how hard you try, nothing will ever be clean? There is no CLEAN - it doesn’t exist. No germ can truly be wiped off your sofa once it’s there. And it’s nearly impossible for it to not end up there at some point, because you sit in your car, in the bus, in the office, you go to stores etc. and bring them home onto your couch. That so, if you do not undergo a complete head to toe disinfection procedure and burn your clothes, each time you re-enter your sacred space. Washing your hands turns out to be more of a gesture. Literally.

And then I stumbled over the term poggers. Yes I did. And yes it made my brain explode several times. Also I was confronted with BC. It stands for “before Corona”. Yes it does. I finally got the memo too thank you. It was most definitely out of the “post label” drawer. Not to label that drawer but… you know what I mean. These are the times, in which the world changes right in front of our eyes people.

I have another important fact, which I had completely forgotten to update you about. I had written about foxes in Berlin previously and rambled on about hibernation and how I needed to be left the fuck alone bla bla. So it turns out they are wide-awake as we speak. They’ve been making creepy, loud and childlike noises at night outside my window. Night after night after night. So as I sighted the creature producing those sounds, I got back to do the homework I hadn’t done previously. Guess what? They do not hibernate. Not at all. It was full on mating season. They were yelling for a mate. After one week, I started begging the gods to get them to fuck on and off so I could get some sleep and after another week, they had finally made up their minds on who to spread their cute foxy genes with. Yay.

Since I have been stuck in quarantine for a week now and another one to go, I spent a lot of time on social media. I’ve watched and listened to people, that needed me to listen and once again I need to say and I can’t stress this enough - although I am probably not the best person to talk, as English isn’t my first language - but it is so important to be able to say a straight up if somehow possible grammatically correct sentence if spoken in public. The new generation needs to see and hear, that the spokes man of our generation aren’t as useless as they seem. It is important and again - I can’t stress this enough - to say a correct sentence out loud as your former 3rd grade teacher would have approved it with an at least silver star. Please. Be a role model. I know there is no autocorrect that can improve your insignificant verbal diarrhoea in real time just yet, but that isn’t even close to an excuse.

So since I was locked-in without a warning, obviously I needed food shopping at some point and therefor looked into the most famous supermarket chain around here, to eventually order a home delivery. After I carefully had chosen what I liked first, then cut it down to what I wanted and then to what I really, really essentially needed, I was told before checkout, that the earliest delivery would be next week. So now I was left with the bitter taste of knowing which essential items I really, really was gonna live without in the near future. Luckily I found a friend to do the delivery last week and one to do the delivery this week. Thank you Leah and thank you Tom!

There’s one more thing that has been heavy on my mind. Jackfruit and Durian isn’t the same. Look it up before spreading more fake news! It’s a whole different ballpark. A whole different arena. A complete different sports club! The only common fact is, that they are both extremely – and I can’t stress this enough – tasty.