The *uckenings 37

I have tried to stay out of trouble. So I deleted bumble and started looking at the ‘pets-for-adoption’-site of Berlin. I’m thinking about visiting Paul Hugo – just to find out how snappy he is.

Other then that? Nothing. Not a thing. Natha. The winter is bitter and sour and icy all at once. Petrus must be sitting on a cloud up there thinking: ‘Hm. Rain, snow, rain, snow…I can’t make up my mind! How about both my lovely humans?’ And then he went ahead and gave us both. For two weeks straight now. I hope he’s enjoying himself up there, cause it sure as hell sucks down here.

Remember when we were complaining about the heat wave last summer? Yeah, me too. I’d like to have some of that please. Like any day now, please. Just in case you’re taking requests or something. No pressure.

Enough about the weather. Let’s talk about Corona! Of course I'm joking. I won’t talk about Corona on here. This is a Corona free blog. A non-pandemic area. A no sneeze zone.

Then again, what else is there to talk about atm? My dear friend Adri in Brazil just showed me her stitched up finger. She unfortunately cleaned a mixer and accidentally switched it on. Did you know how many stitches fit on a little finger? 16. My other friends are hanging out with my ex. Life’s a bitch I tell you.

Furthermore, I have decided to embrace my cellulite. In the 16th century it was regarded as a female ideal to have bumpy skin on your but. Whoever decided it wasn’t aesthetic (for whatever reason nobody cares), is probably dead and I hope he never had children.

I hate spitting. I hardly get past my daily teeth brushing without gagging. I hate people spitting on the ground. It’s a horrendous thing to do. Now, we’ve all heard about aerosol right? I think you know where I am going and this is your chance to bail. So aerosol is nothing less than traveling spit. Tiny particles of it coming out of one persons mouth or nose and then coming into you traveling trough your mouth or nose. Kill. Me. Now. I was fine before we analysed the aerosol situation. But I will never be able to forget about aerosol. aerosol aerosol aerosol for life.

Apparently age expectancy is becoming higher and higher. Imagine in a few centuries people will go:

Hey how old are you?

132.

Ah cool. I’ve just turned 137.

Imagine!